CHOOSING TO FORGIVE

And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.

Matthew 6:12

At a women’s conference recently I had an opportunity to pray with a woman I’ll call Marcia. She was beautiful, well dressed, and confident-looking. Only the pinched expression around her mouth betrayed any hint of her real outlook on life—Marcia was choked with resentment.

Angrily she spewed out the story. After twenty-seven years of marriage, her husband, Lee, had fallen in love with a woman half his age. With hardly a second thought or a backward glance, Lee had left not only Marcia and their three children but their hometown, his insurance business, and a pile of unpaid bills

“At first I was consumed with grief,” she said. “I cried nonstop. Now I’m so angry I feel that if only I knew where he was, I would do something very violent.”

I couldn’t lecture this hurting lady. I didn’t have her problems. But I did tell her a powerful story I once heard at a conference led by Christian speaker and conference leader Clay McLean, a story that helped me understand one reason the Lord so strongly urges us to forgive.

Once after Clay spoke on forgiveness, a very angry woman approached and told him at length why she had no desire to forgive the people who had made her life a living hell. It seemed her two older stepbrothers had sexually abused her every night from the time she was eight until she was sixteen and she finally left home.

Clay stood there horrified by the wrong done to this sad woman. “Lord, what can I say to her?” he silently prayed.

And then it came to him.“And they will continue to abuse you every night until you choose to forgive them,” he said firmly.

“Forgiving them is not to imply that what they did was okay. It means only that you’re releasing them and their sin to God’s judgment so you can get your life back.”

As I told this story, the light dawned on Marcia’s face. She could see that she had imprisoned herself by her unwillingness to forgive Lee. She was ready to forgive.We knelt together and thanked the Lord for the gift of forgiveness.

Then I prayed for Marcia to have the strength to forgive her ex-husband.

“Lord,” she prayed with tears in her eyes, “I choose to do it your way today. I choose to forgive Lee. And if my anger returns tomorrow, help me do it all over again. But for today, I choose to forgive.”

Lord Jesus, thank you for your sacrifice on Calvary, making a way for us to be forgiven and teaching us how to forgive.

We choose forgiveness because it is what you have prescribed for us.

Work through us, empowering us to be instruments of your forgiveness.

Amen

#pray